today is so beautiful...

it's not even noon on a saturday and i'm already in love with this day.

i woke up at just the right time, had some scrambled eggs and toast and have been enjoying some down time.

being here in muncie with no real responsibility is one of the greatest feelings...

i love this town.

i don't know if i talk enough about that...

but that's for another post on another day..

last night was filled with giggles and cookie decorating...

i am more and more thankful for me friends here everyday...

mmmmm....

i need to be reminded more each day to be thankful...

things...

1. i could listen to mumford & sons all day and not get tired of it.... lovely

2. i purchased some flannel sheets this weekend... and now all i want to do is sleep..

3. my room is looking more and more like a child's room as the days pass..

the bright blue paint, clay dinosaurs that david made me, and stuffed monster don't help...

great thing about it is i'm pretty sure it perfectly reflects me

4. i despise socks and any sort of foot-covering in the summer.... in the winter they are my best friend.

5. i love making lists.

6. i have a case of blue moon as my door-stop right now...

7. my boyfriend got me an apron in italy.... i'm still

trying to figure out what i want to embroider on it...

8. snowy sidewalks make me want to hold hands

9. i should be making christmas gifts for people right now....

10...it's becoming more and more difficult for me to not get in my bed and take a nap the longer i sit in my room... silly flannel sheets.

11. i'm in love... it's kinda ridiculous.

12. God is teaching me much about hope... turns out your heart needs hope and i do a really good job of denying my heart that joy.

today I am thankful for Christmas music....

you can judge me if you want...

but today i am whipping out the christmas music...

sufjan will be keeping me company today...

as he sings me into the season....

it's a day for christmas trees and hot chocolate...

now all we need is the snow...

i'm not dismissing Thanksgiving, by any means...

but today my heart needs Christmas...

and this is a week of thankfulness...

what are you thankful for today?

i need a break

this morning it was hard for me to smile.

i'm not sure why...

there's a lot going on in these next few days...

and my heart and mind haven't had a whole lot of time to just sit and catch up.

when i get nearly overwhelmed like this the easiest thing for me to do is to clam up...

and not talk...

which is frustrating to those around me...

especially my boyfriend who got up early to walk to class and had to try to interact with me... being a stone wall.

got to my first class where we were finishing up watching "Hotel Rwanda"...

and although i realize it is just a movie...

these are things that truly happened, and my heart has a very hard time being okay with the images on the screen....

it makes me especially angry because a very dear friend of mine is from Rwanda, her family was refugees during the Civil War in Rwanda... and although she wasn't there for the deepest terror of it all it still hits home for me...

needless to say i didn't even bother going to my second class...

by that point i was in desperate need for some alone time with my Jesus.

so i texted a roommate and i am blessed enough for roommates who let me borrow their cars on whims so i could get away..

i ventured to get some coffee and some quite time....

again, my God is good.

He is my joy and my life....

over and over again he fills me up so that i don't have to worry about getting by on my own, because i would fail every time if it was up to me and my abilities....

so when He says, "come to me, all you who are weary and heavy burdened, and i will give you rest"...matthew 11:28....He means it....

today...i am having trouble with patience.

and i am completely aware of the fact that nothing can bring me out of this except for time with my Savior...

luckily He is not suffering with impatience towards me...

and he doesn't get annoyed with me when i don't do dishes, or don't clean the counters...

i guess i should take a lesson from Him..

thank God that He is patient.

it's monday...and my heart is feeling all sunny...

so this weekend i fell in love...

with the band freelance whales...

and i cannot stop listening to "Generator 1st Floor"...

it's actually giving me chills right now, so so beautiful.

just look at them....so so cute.

don't you just wanna be friends with them...

mmmmmm yeah they sure do make some lovely music.

on the other hand, it's a new week.

and i'm wearing argyle socks and drinking from the mustache mug my tremendous boyfriend got me.

my heart is all giggly, and i hope that yours heart feels smiley today as well....

because there is love in this november air.....

oh my goodness!

i just found out that one of my very best friends during high school is pregnant!

and i could not be more excited.

i'm actually super surprised by how excited i am...

i wish she didn't live in virginia so that i could hug her right now.

....

........

now all i can think about is going on a shopping spree for baby stuff...

oh my goodness....

i cannot wait until april!!!

it's wednesday, LOVE!!!!

today...

• i want to build a fort and stay inside.
• i laughed so much in allegre.... i am falling in love with the people in that class....
• david came over and we made breakfast together...i love wednesday mornings
• i sat in the basement of the library with my dear friend, meredith, and we talked about life....and read "thidwick the big hearted moose" by dr. seuss.
  sometimes i wish i was a child again
• i vaccuumed and did the dishes... and felt like a 50s housewife
• i got my funk on to lady gaga and kid cudi as i did the dishes..

the weeks just keep passing by faster and faster.

and i'm learning to enjoy each day to its fullest....

how did you live out this wonderful wednesday?

well good morning to you too, mr. piper.

well, john piper hit it spot on today...

"The root of all evil is that we are the kind of people who settle for the love of money instead of the love of God.."

i don't know about you...

but the desire for more stuff is something that i struggle with...a lot.

i get frustrated with myself, over and over again.

but i'm learning more and more that my love for stuff is just me cheapening my joy...

turns out the excitement or "joy" that material possessions can give you is pretty fleeting....

i read something the other day that is sticking in my head like a piece of gum to the bottom of a high-school desk.

i'm reading "desiring God" by john piper and so far it has been outstanding.

here is what i read...

" if the pump of love runs dry it is because the pipe of prayer isn't deep enough..."

this may seem a small statement to some, or obvious to others, but to me it was revolutionary.

since reading this a couple days i have found this sentence floating through my head while interacting with others. and in those moments where i find myself getting absolutely annoyed with someone and when i want to shut down any kind of love i could be extending them i find myself analyzing the situation.
i'm realizing that when i find it hard to love someone it's because i haven't been connecting to God, and because God is love I need him to be able to truly love anyone.

i am so thankful for the things that God is teaching me...so so thankful

i'm back.

it's hard to describe how my heart feels sometimes...

there are days when i feel such joy that all i can do is smile and walk with a skip in my step...

there are other days when my heart is so heavy that i don't know how to function...

today i am feeling joy like i haven't known in a while.

to understand i would have to take you step by step through the past few months of my life.

i'll sum it all up by saying i have been stressed this semester like i've never been before.

if you know me you know that school work is never a top priority for me.

school has been easy for me for a long time, and i've never really had to buckle down.

this semester though there has been one class (and a combination of other things going on in my life) that have sucked the joy right from me...

not to say that this semester has been completely void of joy, but i haven't been myself for a while. this week though i finished a huge assignment for a class, and a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

i am visibly different.

i praise God because He is the only reason that i was sustained through this stress...

this is all very vague, and it sounds petty.

all this stress wasn't solely on account of a class....

but i'm back.

and it feels good.

God is reminding me why I've been dancing and light-footed for so long.

He is renewing me, and today, this week He has saved me, like he so often has before.

my salvation is new each day.

.....

.........

............

i can't stop thinking about....

i think i've told you all before how easily i fall in love...

with anything...

this past week has been filled with moments like that...

so here are ten things that i can't get off my mind...

1. my friend emily....

she is beautiful and if you met here you would fall in love as well.

this week we got to sit together, drink coffee, laugh and dream of coloring our hair teal...

eventually i would love my hair to resemble a peacock

...

2. my friend beth...

i have had very few chances to get to hang out with her this semester..

but thursday night i got to rest my head on her shoulder and it was perfect.

3. this umbrella skirt...

i stumbled across it on this blog and i have a crush...

4. my darling boyfriend...

he made me baked spaghetti for my birthday (even the marinara sauce)

and bought me chocolate milk...

and earlier this week we ate ice cream while sitting in a fort he built...

it was perfect and i'm in love.

5. the fact that i have felt so loved by God this week.

the next few days are gonna be real stressful for me and he keeps reminding my heart that he's not gonna give me anything i can't handle

6. how much fun i had at work yesterday.

i had to work the football game ... not my thing...

but the people i got to work with made me laugh so much...

7. riding bikes to vecinos with david yesterday.

it was beautiful outside....and i beat him...twice...

bam!

8. i get to see my family today!!!

9. my friend ariane has been staying in our house this week...she just recently got back from africa and i have missed her so very much

10. i've journaled so much this week!

and i love going back and looking through what i've journaled over the past year...

hey...happy sunday. i love you.!

it's wednesday...can you even believe it!?!?!?!

my heart is dancing with excitement today....

its skipping.

its basking in the sunlight.

today is a good day and God has done an unbelievable job of refreshing me these last couple days and making His pursuit of me so obvious.

today muncie is bursting with sunshine.

and it is absolutely breathtaking... it makes me want to climb a tree..

or dance a jig...

or litter the sidewalk with chalk drawings...

or set up a lemonade stand...

or just hug people....

i got to talk with 3 of my most favorite virginia tech-ers...and my heart has not settled since i hung up my phone.

yesterday, i talked with my dear texan friend...and was reminded of what it's like when someone is so filled with faith...

we talked about dreams and what we think about the future...

i so value her opinion...

so now i'm determined...

i will dream...and satan can just deal with the fact that he's not winning this one....not ever again...

as you may have read in the last couple posts this semester has been ridiculously stressful.

satan has been attacking my heart, and often times i've just given up resisting...and given in to a whole lot of funks...

i've finally put my foot down, and given him an active "absolutely not..."

because this year...

this year has so much potential...

far too much to let a bunch of measly funks ruin.

so lets share in this delightful autumn sunshine...

things you should know...

1. i'm sorry that i have neglected blogging...as sad as this may sound... i think my heart has been missing it.

2. this has been a difficult semester (emotionally, relationally, spiritually)... and i have cried so much more than i'm used to

3. the afore-mentioned crying has been extremely helpful... and although i used to hate crying... the feeling i get after a good cry may be my new favorite thing.

4. God is doing a work in my heart and my life... i am positive that the end result will be mind-blowing (to me, at least) but this has been so much harder than i imagined

5. i have been blessed with the greatest friends on this planet.... and that may seem super sentimental... but they should know that they are stellar....

6. i have a boyfriend that cares for my heart in a way that i never knew was possible...i'm so thankful that God has given him the heart that he has

7.....this year has so much potential...please remind me to always look for that.

this semester has not started out easy.
i feel like i've been more stressed in the last two weeks combined than i was all last year.
(that might be a dramatic overstatement...)
ahh well.
but of course it is looking up.
it always looks up.
God always has everything in control.
i'm relearning how to bring Him glory by simply enjoying him...
so let's giggle and smile together...
maybe each of us should write down today 10 things about God that make us smile...
enjoy the sunshine...tell someone you love them, mkay?

i apoligize for being so elusive this summer...

my heart is so very excited ab0ut this year...
i'm not real sure yet what all the excitement is about...
some possible explanations..

• my room has been painted bright blue....you should come see it...so lovely
• i am living with a few of my very best friends...lots of cuddling.
• there are 2 kitchens in our new house
• we have a puppy!!!
• it's my senior year...BALL STATE!
• there's the possibility of making so many new friends this year...there are so many beautiful people in muncie!

and any number of things really....
my heart is giddy...
you wanna dance a happy little jig with me...?

sherbert!!!

i eat rainbow sherbert and i'm reminded of being at my grandparent's house in the summer.
i like that feeling...remembering.
two completely different moments in time..
with very similar emotions..
contentment...knowing you're surrounded by people you love and who love you.
it's the start of the 5th week of LT...
and it's been a hard summer...
hard because God is teaching me stuff ...
and it hurts....
but i'm growing...
and the Spirit is filling me..
because i can tell you one thing...this joy is not my own that's for sure.
but i'm baking cookies now...sitting across the table from my good friend, patrick....
and this is a great day...
tell me about yours....

dear virginia beach...i have a crush on you.

so it's been a few days....4 to be exact.
and i have fallen back in love with virginia beach.
saturday i came in with so many apprehensions and a nervous feeling in my stomach.
but once i got here, smelled the ocean air and saw the people i would be spending my summer with i felt so at home.
this is where i'm supposed to be this summer...no doubt in my mind.
i have laughed so much in the past few days...
my heart doesn't know what to do with itself.
i can come back with more details later...

just know that the hotel i'm working at has a tortoise that roams the hotel freely...
tremendous.

summer......i can hear it.

today is my last full day at home before i head off for LT.
i leave for muncie tomorrow morning, spending the day packing and hanging out with a few dear friends before i head to Virginia for ten weeks...
can you even believe that the summer is back again?
summer is one of my very favorite things and this summer is no exception.
some things that i am looking forward to this summer

• walking on the beach
• wearing my new polka dot bathing suit
• spending another summer in Virginia Beach
• having God stretch me and pull me outside my comfort zone
• having pen pals...i will have so many letters to write this summer
• wearing dresses the majority of the days this summer....mmmmm.
• picnics on the beach
• new VT friends
• basking in the presence of old friends
• baking up a storm for the people i love

yes, it will be a good summer.
and this nervous anticipation is quickly becoming exciting...
summer i am excited for you....

it's up to you...new york.

today...
i am my mom's librarian's assistant.
helping her with inventory.
listening to frank sinatra...
and it reminds me of my favorite movie...
you've got mail...
mmmmm...

"i want to wake up in a city that never sleeps..."

dear new york...some day, some day i will make it to you.

the boy was an old cat...the girl was a clever mouse

today has been a collection of so many wonderful things.
starting off the day with a bowl of oatmeal is a pretty good sign that it will be lovely.
we finally took our christmas tree down...
don't judge us...
the tree morphed from a christmas to valentines day to st. patrick's day to cinco de mayo tree...
but today was the day...
he needed to be taken down.
so it came down, unceremoniously...and our living room looked bare.
ahh well...just room for excitement for the tree's adventures next year, right?
i headed home with my dear friend layne...introducing her to the wondrous land that is marion, IN.
after filling ourselves with mexican food and sonic we ventured to my home... which we decided could easily be labeled a "homestead" with the amount of barns we have...
today has been a great day for my heart.
smiles, laughter, calm drives through the country, baking of granola and black bean brownies.
it was a day that promised numerous adventures for the rest of the summer....
get excited...

wow, guys...obviously i'm no good at this blogging everyday thing..
maybe i'll catch up later?

the first of many.

my darling friend ambria challenged me to 90 blogs in 90 days ...
here i go...may 1st...89 more to go.
i bought flowers at the farmers market this morning...
that was lovely...
an older woman made a point to tell me how i did fantastic job of picking flowers...
it made me smile.
my life has been filled with exciting challenges recently...
and i know with this coming summer at LT there will be many more.
let's hope i can face them head on...
well i must go for now...
i have a night of muffin baking and guacamole making to do.

dear lionel richie...let's dance on the ceiling, please?

life is far too beautiful to not be thankful
here are some of my reasons for believing this:

• it's rainy...and i get to wear my rain boots with a dress and tights. (and feel like a 5-year old that gets to play in the rain)
• i am eating oatmeal with peanut butter and bananas for lunch
• i am reminiscing about the apple dumplings my darling friends steve and liz made at my place last night....oh my goodness.
• i actually stayed awake through the entirety of avatar last night....can't say the same for steve
• my boyfriend sends me good morning texts referring to me as "sweetpea"....and as much as i'm not a fan of pet names...i love it when he calls me that
• it's the start of a glorious new week with so much possibility
• eleanor and i just sat and watched sesame street clips on youtube for nearly a half hour
• 'elvis' - the cat. is sleeping with his head propped up on my pile of books on our dining room table....far too adorable to be annoyed
• i ran into one of my dearest friends, meredith, on the way to class.
• i witnessed a boy dancing around the stop sign (think 'singing in the rain') on my way back home
• i get to spend sunday with my family...and my heart is oh so excited...

i could go on....but you may get annoyed...
and i'm pretty sure you get the point.
God has blessed me with another day to live in the freedom of His grace.
how are you living out your freedom?

p.s. i love you...lots.

and then the sun rose again...

something you should know about me....
these past few days i have been ridiculously stressed out.
the devil got a foothold...and took advantage of it.
i hate being stressed out...
when i'm stressed out i'm not joyful...and i fail to encourage like i should.
today i feel redeemed.
God woke me up again today...and of course the sun was shining.
He's doing a work in my heart...of course He is.
today i feel loved. and i'm trying to live it.
How has God been woo-ing you today?
.....

on another note i can't get this song out of my head.
Brett Dennen's: Blessed
I welcome the sun,
the clouds and rain,
the wind that sweeps the sky clean
and lets the sun shine again.
this is the most magnificent life has ever been.
here is heaven and earth
and the brilliant sky in between.

blessed is this life
and I'm gonna celebrate being alive.
blessed is this life
and I'm gonna celebrate being alive

I dwell in the darkness
I let in the light
I sleep in the afternoon
and become the noise in the night
I trespass in temptation
suffered in sacrifice
but I awake each day with a new sunrise

blessed is this life, oh
and I'm gonna celebrate being alive
blessed is this life, oh
and I'm gonna celebrate being alive

you are a treasure.

check out this blog....you will smile.

today is...

• beautiful.
• a perfect day to eat frozen blueberries from my favorite blue teacup.
• a day that makes me yearn for the ease of summer.
• a day for friends
• a day for telling those around you that you love them.
• a perfect day for breakfasts of french toast shared with friends.
• a new day...
• a day for smiles..

i woke up this morning with a crush.
although this day is windy, a bit chilly and looking like rain i think i realized i'm falling in love with munie.
muncie in the spring that is...
i love the simplicity of days like this.
i love waking up and feeling like this is where God wants me.
i love the community here that i can depend on.
i love text messages telling me of how much he cares for me.
i hope that your day is filled with hope and smiles.
because i love you...and guess what... HE does too.

today i am inspired by...

Enjoy! Cupcakes

please check out this family business' website.
it's possibly the most charming cupcakery i've come across yet.
there is a ridiculous amount of flavors, with a menu that changes every week.
i hope to have an opportunity to own a business like this someday....
mmmmmmmmmm.....

little notes on a strange day.

today i just don't feel quite up to par.
it may be the rush to finish things this morning...silly procrastination.
or this funny feeling in my stomach...
or the fact that my junior year is so close to being over...
any number of things really.
but i need to get my focus back on the blessings in my life...

dear God,
today is absolutely beautiful. the sun is shining, the birds are chirping, windows are open with fresh air streaming through. you woo us all in such outstanding ways. thank you for so elaborately caring for the hearts of your children.

dear house church,
family dinner was outstanding last night. i am in love with my family here in muncie. you guys do not even know how much you make me smile.

dear rebekah brown,
i am so looking forward to seeing you on this most glorious of easter weekends. my heart is yearning for its best friend...let's cuddle?

dear david,
you are much more patient than i deserve. thanks for putting up with my funks, and for helping me bake ... you make my heart dance a little jig.

dearest VT friends,
my heart is yearning for you. last weekend was perfect. laughing with you was exactly the rest my soul needed. i look forward to our next encounters......you remind me of who i truly am. thank you for loving me with the love of Christ.

dear oatmeal,
you go so swimmingly with the granola i made yesterday. good job at settling my upset stomach. once again...you have prevailed as the greatest food ever invented.

dear green dress,
you make me feel like a princess when i feel under the weather. i will wear you today and dream of what adventures i will go on with you this summer in virginia beach.

the sunshine holds so much promise

i'm eating some frozen blueberries...
my fingers are stained purple...
and i'm thinking about the summer.
both the future and the past.
i spent the weekend with some of my dearest friends
and i realized...i feel more like myself when i'm with them.
they are my community...my family.
and i thank God every day that he so perfectly placed each of them in my life.

ugg...so i guess it's monday again.

it's nearly 3 in the afternoon and i'm still wiping sleep from my eyes.
silly rain...you're making me drag.
my heart misses the sunshine and warmth of last week.
i will just hope that tomorrow will be better and i can live it well.
my heart's feeling a bit heavy today...
i don't know if i can blame it all on the weather.
silly stress.
well, in light of this i should probably think of things that make me smile...
so here i go.
...
1. Friday night...picnic, climbing trees, the dairy dream and friends
2. The fact that last week was beautiful and warm every day...makes me yearn for the summer in Virginia
3. the dinosaur shaped mac 'n cheese that david and i had for lunch one day last week
4. the fact that meredith brought me peanut butter last night, without knowing there were going to be oreos to dip in it...wonderful
5. hanging out with my family yesterday
6. anticipating my trip to Virginia Tech this weekend
7. my bright green rainboots
8. the truth that Andrea shared with me last night, "God wants rest for us..." and i so am in need of that rest right now
9. the possibility of giving a speech on cupcakes...yep, i think i just may
10. the oatmeal with peanut butter, honey and bananas that i had for breakfast...

so see..i have nothing to complain about.
my heart has been filled, and i need to be joyful.
smile with me?

the girl next to me in the library just opened up a container of brownies...
the heavenly smell of chocolate just will not escape me...
i'm questioning whether it's socially acceptable to ask if i can have one of her many brownies..
what a tease.

image

it has been an absolutely beautiful day.
did you see the sun? did you greet him with a hearty hello this morning?
i sure hope you welcomed him...so he feels like he can stay.

worn out shoes

this is lovely.
it's making my heart smile right now...
i hope it makes you smile as well...

"there's a hole in the roof for the stars to fall in
i gather them up for you
fill up my pockets, start walking again
bringing these stars to you
bringing these stars to you
bringing these stars to you again..."
-joe purdy "worn out shoes"

again with this smirk.

i feel like i've been neglecting this this semester...
i should probably change that.
today it's sunny in muncie.
my heart hasn't settled down since i first saw the sun this morning through my cracked blinds.
yes, muncie. you got it goin' on today.
i know that valentine's day has come and gone...
but when i look at the fake evergreen in our living room, still decorated for valentines...
i can't help but feel giddy.
something you should know about me is..
i don't need a holiday to talk about love.
or tell people how dear they are to me.
so i'm going to take this opportunity today.

things i love today:
1. the warmth of the sunshine. i was outside without a hat or mittens and didn't feel cold.
i can almost feel spring.
2. playing the "let's guess where the snow isn't slush" game as i walk to class.
3. playing fetch with my cat... yes. the cat plays fetch. be impressed
4. the vegetarian chili made last night that was reheated to be the perfect lunch
5. a handful of semi-sweet chocolate chips
6. the smell of the newspaper sitting next to me
7. listening to the glee soundtrack. make fun all you want, i can't get enough of it.
8. goldfish....
9. the idea of making banana chocolate chip muffins next week
10. mocassins....

what do you love today?
what's making your heart dance.
whatever it is..i hope that you aren't able to wipe a silly grin from your face.

there's something about the first day of a semester that makes me feel like i'm in elementary school again.
it may be the "first day of school" picture my house took this morning.
or the tremendous orange i just bit into.
this is monday.
it's a gift.
pardon me while i go live it.

what do you say to taking chances?...

so....i haven't been here much recently...
and by recently i mean i haven't been here all break.
i kind of expected to venture here a lot, but that hasn't been the case.
with that in mind, and my tea (with honey) by my side, get ready for there is much to tell.

i have experienced so much love, joy and laughter in this break.
God is good, and he is caring for my heart so well.
the highlight of my break (which i expected) was the conference i just recently got back from.
after leaving my friends at LT this summer, I had this conference to look forward to, knowing that this would be when i could once again hug and cuddle with them.
silly tears of joy. you should've seen me when i saw my dearest karin, tricia, brett, ryan, eric, kristin and josh...there were skips and hops, and my heart was dancing like crazy.
my heart felt whole once again, this family that was given to me this summer was reunited.
these are people that remind me how terribly important it is to live life to the fullest.
so here's to you, my loves: for the escalator rides, spinning hugs, ice cream, giggles, beds shared, surprise trips and glimpses of what heaven is sure to be like.
my heart so badly wants everyone to experience community like this.
this is something that i am realizing more and more that i am most passionate about.
this is what life is supposed to look like, the life that Jesus speaks of us living to the fullest.
and i know that i more often than not fall short of this life, but know that i am trying...so please keep me accountable in this.

but hey, it's a new year.
so let's wake up together, mkay?